Dear Bella,

I got to spend time with you in my dreams last night. This is the first time this has happened but it would be awesome if it wasn’t the last. We were at some kind of mall with a water fountain. I remember I was just following you around wherever you wanted to go. I stayed as close as possible to you, holding you when you weren’t running around like a toddler. When you would sit on my lap, I remember I stroked your arm and felt your soft skin. We were emotionally connected like mother and daughter might be.

I am so sorry that this separation has happened. Blame changes nothing. Our feelings will be both of ours to deal with. When I’m allowed, I will be there for you. I will listen to your feelings and support you in ways that I didn’t even know existed when you were born. I wouldn’t have had the chance to learn some of the unconditional love and practices that I have learned without our seperation. There’s an interesting thought. When I started all of this, my heart was in the right spot. Since then, your birth, and the separation from you, I have learned a lot and grown so much. I’m sure you have as well, but you cheat because you are a child. Haha.